Dear all, eight years ago this summer, Bettina and her family were driving back from Austria to Germany when they were involved in a road accident. Miraculously, they were unharmed, but not everyone involved was so lucky. Bettina tells us here how they, as a family, have come to terms with what happened.
Dear Bettina, you were in a road accident – how long ago was that, and who else was in the car?
Yes, the accident happened on 28 July 2018. My whole family was in the car: My husband, our two daughters, who were 4 and almost 6 years old at the time, and our puppy ‘Happy’.
Had it been a completely normal day for you up to that point? Where were you coming from, and where were you heading?
We were on our way home from Austria, heading towards Cologne/Bonn.
How do you remember realising: something’s not right here?
We were on the motorway and it happened in a flash. My husband was at the wheel; the cars in front of us were slowing down, and he said: „What on earth is he on about? He’s driving far too fast!“
What memories do you have of the minutes immediately afterwards?
The occupants of the vehicle to our right didn’t get out, and the car caught fire immediately afterwards. My husband got out and ran over. The blue car, which had been going so fast, crashed into the car to our right, rolled over and then came to a halt in front of our car. My husband wanted to help those people.
Other emergency services arrived quickly too. In the blue car were two elderly ladies (I think they were sisters); one was still conscious, the other had fainted. A man also came out of a lorry carrying a fire extinguisher to put out the flames in the car to our right. The fire spread so quickly and it was sooo extremely hot – I still remember that.
Another car had also caught fire, and people were still trying to get things out of it. It felt as though the emergency services were on the scene very quickly. My husband then stepped to the side, and that’s when he fainted. I sat in the car with the children the whole time. I think I pulled a jacket over their heads so they wouldn’t have to see everything. They were crying and cuddling the dog.
What happened next for you from there? Did you go to the hospital for observation?
We were questioned by a police officer and were then allowed to carry on. We were all unharmed and our car didn’t have a single scratch either!
How did you cope as a family? Did you just hold each other close? Talk a lot?
We stopped again at the next car park and talked. It had already got late. The children had calmed down and wanted to sleep. My husband wanted to go home, so we eventually drove on.
How and when did you find out that two people hadn’t survived the accident?
The next day we found out from the news what had happened. A mother and her daughter had been burned to death in the car next to us. If you’d like to find out more details about the accident, you can read this article on the subject.
What was your first thought?
It only gradually dawned on us just how incredibly lucky we were. The odds were basically 50:50. It could just as easily have been us. How incredibly terrible for the bereaved.
Some time later, we learnt from the media that one of the two women in the blue car had also died later as a result of the accident.
And in the long term: do you still think about it a lot? Did that day change you? Do you sometimes think „What if“?
Basically, we think about it every time we drive past that spot: I’m originally from Linz in Austria and we go there twice a year. But also whenever the anniversary of the accident comes round. That day is also my husband’s cousin’s birthday, and just before the accident we’d recorded a video singing to him and wishing him a happy birthday…
We thought about the ‘what if…’8220; was what occupied us most in the days following the accident. It came up again during the court hearing, to which we were later summoned. We don’t feel any sort of „survivor’s guilt“, the overriding thought is rather: what incredible luck we had…
Has anything stayed with you since then? Do you drive very carefully now, for example?
Actually, the ‘only’ thing that’s stayed with us is that queasy feeling when we drive past that spot. We always pause for a moment’s silence… sometimes my husband says something at that spot, sometimes I do… It usually starts with: ‘Do you remember…’
Was there anything positive that you were able to take away from all of this?
Right now – to be honest – a great sense of gratitude that it didn’t happen to us and that we are able to watch our children grow up (even though the teenage years are certainly a challenge!), that we can continue to enjoy our lives and that we are doing well!
