Dear ones, I would like to talk to you today about the subject of children’s surprises and how much our youngsters amaze us time and time again.
The other day, I received the happy news from a friend that her son, who has only ever received reprimands and „you’re too much“ admonishments at school in recent years, has now been invited by a sports scout to a sighting training. The whole family celebrated with a big pizza order and I was so touched because I can relate to it myself.
We’re kind of lion mums and when our children have a harder time, our love doesn’t diminish! We tend to go into defence mode, encourage our protégés and then freak out even more with joy when we get a boost of self-confidence from outside. When our child is seen in the truest sense of the word!
The joy is super intense when, for example, they bring home a D in maths, even though the primary school teacher may have claimed at the time that there would never be anything to be gained from our child – well, it goes without saying that we throw confetti here too.
Children’s surprise: Unexpected joy!
When there’s a teacher who doesn’t put the child with ADHD outside the door as a punishment, but turns the child into a „copy assistant“ and says: „Hey, I need a little help, can you come to the office for a minute?“ and the two of them then hop to the room or walk backwards and do a hop run so that the child can let off steam for a moment and then concentrate again – without being labelled a troublemaker, but at eye level and picked up where they stand. When I hear things like that, I get tears in my eyes. How worried parents are about their non-conformist child… and how wonderful it is when they are simply taken as they are.
Of course, there are also children for whom everything just seems to fall into place. And of course the parents are happy too, but today we want to talk about those who perhaps struggle from time to time – and whose sense of achievement feels so intense for everyone.
Last week, a friend told me that her son had been studying for the ZPs – the central final exams for year 10 – for six months and then suddenly sat in front of her shortly beforehand and wondered why everyone else found foreign languages so easy, but not him. And then his little brother arrives and lists all the things he can do instead. And how he then suddenly celebrated passing his driving licence and being accepted by the training company. What you can do!
So do we sometimes need the deep valleys in order to be able to celebrate the happy moments much more blatantly? I think parents whose children „go through it“ are also proud of them, but perhaps it’s more familiar, less surprising. And someone who has trembled once and is then safe again is simply more relieved than someone who never exposes themselves to danger. Maybe you could say that.
In any case, I celebrate all parents who celebrate their children because, contrary to all outside predictions, they surprise them. Because the one who left school after year 9 without any qualifications is now suddenly taking over a farm.
Because the one who developed a fear of school during puberty suddenly discovered what he really enjoys and what drives him during an internship. Because the troublemaker in the class is suddenly invited to an assessment training session and the child who didn’t get a recommendation for secondary school suddenly has a vocational qualification in their pocket. When those who perhaps not everyone believed in suddenly make their way. Let it rain colourful confetti for them. And for the parents too!
P.S.: And for all those where the good end is not yet in sight, let it also rain confetti. As an encouragement. As a beacon of hope. For the smallest of small steps forwards.
